Monday, September 6, 2010
Numinous time before birth of my granddaughters
But they are not here yet, even though they are alive and kicking! And I do not have the physical, embodied relationship with them, that I had with my two children. So I am not sure how I feel, but the feeling is intense and moving. When they come into this realm, I will be immediately different too, a grandmother. Our relationship will be immutable, unchangeable, and there are very few unchangeable things in this world. I cannot even call their names, and I cannot know who they will look like.
It is such a transition time, germinating, not really fallow, but yes, they are seeds that have been growing in the dark, protective womb of their mother. Right now all that they need and their potential life story is contained and held. Somehow their spark of life happened, through love, I believe. But there is the biology of it too, that manifests this mysterious life force. And this biology can be effected by outside forces, not by the conscious will of their mother, not by any truly rational choices of our culture and influenced by place and time.
I believe this changeable biology creates a responsibility on me, because I would never want an action that I do to harm my grandchildren. But I know I have done harmful things and continue to do them. I realize that how I live on this earth is what my granddaughters will inherit. I understand that my relationship with my all-encompassing Mother Earth somehow is immutable too, just like my relationship with my granddaughters. And I feel that my Mother Earth, who holds and nurtures and feeds me is beneficent. She would not want to harm either, yet she accepts what is happening to her, with involuntary surrender.
I understand that I hurt my environment with my choices or ignorance. And those choices invade my daughter-in-law's body and my grandchildren's development. This is not right on so many levels, perhaps that is why this is such an emotional time for me. I am so close to the effects of my actions being exhibited in my granddaughters. Yes, that is it.
I am conscious of the delicate dance with my daughter-in-law of being helpful, not pushy, supportive but not being a know-it-all; understanding that I have a unique relationship with these as yet unborn creatures, that confers a particular joy and responsibility that only I have. Perhaps if I keep this numinous space in my awareness, I will better understand what I can do to help my earth and my grandchildren. Then when the embodied birth happens, like my granddaughters very physical appearance in this realm, I will also realize and do what is real in this world to help all my relations and my sustaining mother earth.
Why EcoBirth’s My Personal Environmental Story
EcoBirth’s My Personal Environmental Story will help women tell their life story by considering the two primary environments- place and birth- for themselves, their mothers and their maternal grandmothers. Through this process each participant will come to realize the hazards in their environmental genealogy and realize the healing in telling their own story. And they will be empowered to affect the changes that are necessary for our Mother Earth and our children and grandchildren to thrive.
Imagine looking back to your grandmother's and mother's birth time to figure out what environmental influences you might have inherited? And have passed onto your children and grandchildren? Would you wonder what was in the air, water and food in their lives- and look twice at what diseases, birth defects, addictions there are in your family?
Very useful links recommended by EcoBirth
- Breast Cancer Fund
- Center for Environmental Health
- Childbirth Connection
- Children's Environmental Health Network
- Coalition for Improving Maternity Services
- Collaborative on Health and the Environment
- Endocrine Disruption
- Pesticide Action Network
- Physicians for Social Responsibility
- Safe Cosmetics Campaign
- Science and Environmental Health Network
- Steingraber website
- Toxic Free Future
- Womens Voices for the Earth
Before Childhood links- for a healthy body, pregnancy and baby
- ▼ 09/05 - 09/12 (3)